AM: How did you experience the emotion of love?
Me: I lived it in different ways, always seeing it from that part that I relate to the search for love, which in my case represented love for life.
AM: meaningless perception, because it turns out that life is so short from the point of view of the Universe, which is the ALL, that we would be talking about love for a whole blink of an eye.
Me: hahaha, turns out you’re funny too
AM: it’s part of my/your own essence! Let’s get to the point, how have you lived it throughout your life?
Me: well, back when I was 6 years old, I fell deeply in love with my first grade teacher. Her name was Cristina, she was blonde and extremely sweet. It is a feeling that I still remember to this day: healthy, simple and where the heart beats when I saw her, and the environment was filled with colors, brightness and light. This feeling lasted all that year and the next, until I found out that she was getting married, and even though I was small, I felt it as a disappointment.
AM: already early on suffering for love…
Me: my first great mobilization with love happened when I was 20 years old, studying a career in Aviation, when I met the sister of a college classmate. The day I saw her, I got back that feeling I had felt when I was 6 years old, which I had never felt before. An angel on Earth, of a kindness, gentleness, beauty, that captivated me instantly.
AM: but now it was no longer the love of a child, but that of an adult, so the problems are different.
Me: yes, still with a teenager’s mind, the problem in this case turned out to be that there was no correspondence in that love I felt. One thing was to be acquaintances, friends, and another thing was to have a deeper relationship.
The point is that, faced with the mental, physical, and hormonal imbalance I had, the only thing I wanted was for us to become boyfriend and girlfriend. She needed to learn English, and I offered to be her teacher, so I had, whenever I could, the opportunity to talk to her, alone, which I couldn’t otherwise. I know that I am a person who can talk, and talk, reason and bring to my shore who is in the middle of the river, so, day by day, there were comments, talks, and so on, in which I tried to transform that good friendship into something else.
AM: full manipulation is usually called
Me: yes, full manipulation. I was doing it because I was madly in love!!!
AM: full justification. The beauty comes next
Me: The pressure was such that, when the time came, I proposed to her that we should become boyfriend and girlfriend, and I feel today that I insisted so much to the poor girl, that that specific day she said yes, that we were going out as boyfriend and girlfriend. At that moment, instead of giving her the kiss on the mouth that I was waiting for so long, something inside me came up in which the following words came out of me: «I’m glad you accept it, but I want you to think it over and tomorrow you tell me if you want to have a relationship with me».
AM: that inner thing that came up was me that I had to intervene, especially because of what happened afterwards.
Me: The next day, I receive a message that she had left urgently to her city in the interior of Argentina, where her parents lived, and that she would not return to Buenos Aires. Then, after a while she sends me a message that she had gotten engaged to a guy from her city, so I spent the whole day crying in front of the Obelisk in the city of Buenos Aires, which was where I was when I received that message.
AM: maybe many people thought that you were crying because you saw that architectural work so characteristic of the city.
Me: and the jokes continue.
AM: the point is that, unfortunately, it would have been a very unhappy way of living the experience of love. Many time the human being covers everything he does not want to see, precisely to get the other and place him in a trophy position, and he does not care how he gets it. These are things of each being in his own path, but it is still an unhappy image.
Me: it was fortunate that nothing happened. Neither of us deserved this
AM: to deserve comes from the vulgar Latin merescere, that it means to be worthy of a prize, something that does not exist in the Universe, which means that it is another human creation.
We will continue talking about love and what was the end of all this.
Now I invite you all to watch the video of Matias with the explanation of the topic of the day.
Finally, I encourage everyone to engage in conversation with their own I Am, to listen to what we each have to say to each other. No one else but us can re-signify our own being!