AM: are you comfortable?
Me: I have to think about it. I don’t want to give you just any answer when this concept is not so easy for me to place it where it should be.
AM: as long as it starts from your essence, it will be placed correctly.
Me: which leads me to work on it, because I am not sure if it starts from my essence or from my patterns, my environment and everything that can distort it.
AM: it counts
Me: the concept of comfort, like many others, I dualize it. On the one hand, I understand it as something personal, of being and feeling comfortable in what I do, think, execute, as well as in the place I occupy, where I live, how I live, and from that side, other concepts appear, which we have seen, such as wealth, security, necessary in my case, to achieve the comfort I am talking about. Then, there is the concept of comfort related to the use that others can make of certain situations, taking advantage and using certain gadgets to stop doing things that should be done and leaving them to the discretion of others, for pure comfort. I have never liked that part.
AM: although you have also used it for your own benefit.
Me: yes. I still don’t like it.
AM: let’s go for the latter. And what action have you taken about it?
Me: let’s see. The times that I used convenience as a tool to take advantage of it, I always applied the technique of finding the perfect excuse for why I did it this way. For example, I have a friend who used to use glasses, cutlery, which he then left in the kitchen sink without washing, in the office, and left them there for one, two, three days without doing anything.
AM: and you felt how seeing more and more dirty junk every day made you go tomato, as they say in your country.
Me: it drove me crazy! I, who serve myself something and when I finish, I go, wash it and leave it in the right place, just out of consideration for the rest, I always found it disrespectful not to do it.
AM: and with all your baggage of learning in this path of life, you accumulated, until you exploded, and your ironic and very hurtful comments, ended up bothering the executor of such audacity, but many times you ended up washing everything to leave it clean.
Me: and that’s where my annoyance with his comfort came in, he was obviously bothered by what I told him, for a couple of days he would do his job, but then he would go back to the same thing.
AM: another perspective, another way of seeing things, where the grooming at the moment was not what I considered important, and where I did not consider that it should be a nuisance for the rest.
Me: therein lay the issue. When you don’t see that it’s a problem, by not considering it, by not looking at the situation, not looking at the environment, I get it. Now, when the issue is that you already talk, you know what the other thinks, not doing so seems to me to be a joke.
AM: very extreme perspective. He can understand it, he can see that it bothers you, but why do exactly what you say? If it doesn’t bother him. Shouldn’t you work on that problem?
Me: I understand that we should both work on it. Me, because of the discomfort. Him’, because of the dirtiness of leaving things in the sink for two or three days without washing.
AM: it is coherent. But you know you should work on your own, not force someone else to work because you think it is fair and consistent.
Me: yes, of course. But the issue of relationships with others is what makes feelings get mixed, and obviously, that is usually the root of many of the problems that we cannot even control how to solve them, because not only our own perspective prevails, but there are many more, and the negotiation, which often occurs with people who are in a moment of imbalance or incoherence, and therefore, everything becomes much more difficult.
AM: and you add the issue of how important it is to resolve an issue for the parties. Maybe for you it is very important to have a clean kitchen, while for someone else it is not.
Me: yes, and there comes in the preponderance of what is important and who has more influence, power, or whatever, to get personal satisfaction.
AM: and increase one’s own comfort over that of the other.
Me: what a good point! Obviously for me, having everything clean and tidy is synonymous with comfort. Maybe for him, cleaning the kitchen junk once a week is his perception of perfect comfort. But, in between, there is the mutual comfort in the situation of daily interaction of both of us.
AM: the big question is, how does this issue turn out today?
Me: sometimes I find something to wash, and I clean it. Most of the time, he washes his stuff when he is done or early the next day. But we don’t talk or bother about it anymore. Although I don’t want to say that if someday there are several things left that he used where he always used, I can tell him if he cleans them….
AM: does it still bother you that they are left there without washing?
Me: a little. But it doesn’t irritate me.
AM: it is progress. You know you should continue to work on it?
Me: of course. For that I do all this every day
AM: perfect! Well, it is part of the comfort of your essence.
I invite everyone to watch Matías’ video with the theme of the day
Finally, I encourage everyone to engage in conversation with their own I Am, to listen to what we each have to say to each other. No one else but us can re-signify our own being